Posted in Sunday Reflections

Tears as Prayers

Psalm 56:8 “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.”

I thought about this verse the other night when at 2:00 a.m. after waking up from having dozed off in the recliner, I found myself feeling an inexplicable sense of sadness to the point I was crying myself back to sleep after retiring to bed. I still don’t know why I was sad and why I was crying. But I do know that I wasn’t alone. God was there with me. He knew what was hurting my soul even if I didn’t. Over the years I have come to understand and believe that tears can be prayers. Even when I have no words for my sorrow, God can interpret the reason.

God doesn’t always need to hear our words to hear our prayers. All he requires is for us to be intentionally present with him. Speak when you need to speak. Listen when you need to listen. And even cry when you need to cry.

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Posted in Personal Thoughts

I’m Tired of Saying No

Speaking of being tired, I know everyone is tired of hearing about, reading about, and talking about COVID-19. So, I’ll forgive you if you want to just skip this post and go on about your business. But, first let me say what this entry is about and what is not about.

It is NOT about the vaccine and whether you should take it or not. It is NOT about masks and whether or when you should wear one or not. There are plenty of places where you can read about those issues and from people that are a lot more knowledgeable about it than I could pretend to be.

Simply, what follows here is my personal venting about how I currently feel from my own personal experience in the healthcare field. I work in an Emergency Department, but I am not in a clinical role. Thus, my experience is different than those who work deep in the trenches and are treating patients with COVID or with a myriad of other problems that, yes, still plague us mortal human beings.

If interested, read on. If not, that’s fine with me. This is mostly and mainly for my own stress relief and my own mental health.

  • I’m Tired of Saying No, I’m sorry but you can’t come in to visit to the person who is deeply worried about their family member who is either positive or being tested.
  • I’m Tired of Saying No, I’m sorry but your family can’t come in with you to the patient who is positive or being tested and is scared to be alone.
  • I’m Tired of Saying No, we don’t have any open beds to the patient who has been waiting 5 hours or more for an ER bed because our rooms are full of patients being held and waiting to be admitted.
  • I’m Tired of Saying No, I’m sorry this hallway bed is the best we can do right now because all the regular ER beds are full.
  • I’m Tired of Saying No, Melissa, don’t take it personal as a patient or family member yells at me and calls me names because they don’t like the answer I just gave them about when they may finally get to see a Doctor.
  • I’m Tired of Saying No, it’s not any better than it was yesterday to my co-workers as they arrive for their shift.
  • I’m Tired of Saying No, you don’t have to apologize to the co-worker who snapped at me earlier because of the stress they are under and now feels bad about it.
  • I’m Tired of Saying No, I don’t know when this will be over.
  • I’m Tired of Sayin No, I’m not okay. I’m tired.

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Posted in Sunday Reflections

WORDS – A Prayer

Lord, today I offer up my words.

Let me be careful in what I say and how I say it.

Contrary to the childhood rhyme, I know words can hurt. Though they may not break bones, they can break spirits, wills, and psyches. Which sometimes is even harder to heal.

Let me uplift, enlighten, encourage, and offer hope to others with what I speak. Let that include the words and thoughts I speak to myself as well.

Amen.

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Posted in Poetry

False Impressions – A Poem

False Impressions
by Melissa Peeler
Precise preparations
Bold outlines dividing
Reds, Blues, Yellows.
Movements practiced until
Gracefulness appears the natural state.

Then came the rain.
With each dip of a wing
dripped another colorful lie
into the rainbow pool gathering
on the ground.
Until there hovered the
drab, gray truth - a moth in a
field of butterflies.

Composed: May 2012

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Posted in Book Review

THE EVENING AND THE MORNING by Ken Follett

Set in England during the Dark Ages and spanning a decade of time from 997-1007 CE, this is a prequel to the Kingsbridge Trilogy which consists of the following titles:

  • The Pillars of the Earth (1989)
    • World Without End (2007)
    • A Column of Fire (2017)

I first encountered this series when I read The Pillars of the Earth in 2008. I immediately fell in love with it and it catapulted up to one of my all time favorites, which it still remains. Unfortunately, I did not write a review of it at the time, so I may have to “force” myself to re-read it so I can opine on it with due diligence. However, I have enough recollection of it to remember it as a wonderful historical of epic proportions with a narrative to get lost in and characters to both love and hate. World Without End, which I encountered in 2010 lived up to its promise and expectation as a long-awaited sequel. Sadly, I was disappointed in A Column of Fire which I read last year. I would not say it was a horrible read, and I would not totally discourage it from being added to one’s reading list. I just didn’t find it as gripping and engrossing as the other two books.

Now, on to the true subject of this review. Like the others, this story follows the lives of a diverse set of characters from varying stations of life.

First, there is Edgar, a young boatbuilder from a poor, hard-working family. His life as he knows it, and his dreams are shattered when his town, his father, and his lover are destroyed in a Viking raid. Edgar, his mother, and his two brothers must relocate and start over amidst an existence that is even more difficult than it was before. Though poor and containing only the knowledge and training instilled by his father, Edgar possesses an innate intelligence for building and craftwork that goes beyond just boats. Likewise, he has a moral compass that keeps his sight on what is true and just beyond what even the laws of the land at the time may dictate. Yet, his station in life hinders him at times to make a difference in the ways he would like.

Second, we have Ragna, a noblewoman from Normandy who travels to England to marry the man she believes to be her true love and soulmate. She, too, is a compassionate person who strives to render justice to those under her rule with fairness and a tender heart. This requires a delicate balancing act on her part so as to not appear weak and lose the people’s respect for her. This is compounded by her struggles to not be undermined by her husband’s family and the power they fight to maintain for their own selfish wants rather than the benefit of those under their domain.

Third, we encounter a monk named Aldred. Though a member of a small abbey, he harbors hopes to one day to see it evolve into a place of great religious learning. Pious and dedicated to the copying and illustrating of sacred texts, his battles take place against Bishops and other religious leaders who are religious in name and title only, not in their beliefs or interests in what is holy. Power and what having power gives them is the only thing their sight is centered upon.

It is the lives, dreams, and intertwining paths of these three individuals that provide the framework for this book. Like the first book of this series, here too is a grand historical adventure of near epic proportions. I say near epic, because it does draw much closer in scale and quality than did the third book. It definitely sits in the category of those books that I would choose to read again in the future. It’s one flaw, though some may see this as an asset, is that it does follow so closely in format to the other books. In that, the plot lines and story arcs are quite predictable for those who have consumed all of the prior ones. This in no way ruined the reading journey for me. I just found myself able to see where the character’s stories were taking them, so there was some lack of suspense and worry as to how their stories would wrap up. I suppose this is an inevitable outcome of reading a prequel. Yet, I still thoroughly enjoyed the journey because though I knew how their stories would end, there was still the unknowing part of how they would get there. That did make it all worthwhile. Follett lives up to the expectation of this reader, at least, and gives us a very satisfying beginning to a beloved series.

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Posted in Books

LRU 2021-2022 Visiting Writer’s Series


This Thursday, September 16th kicks off Lenoir-Rhyne University’s 33rd annual Visiting Writers Series. This program offers a chance to hear a diverse group and genre of authors share about their works and the writing journey behind them.

Year after year, this literary series always delivers with an outstanding line-up of quality and award winning writers. Additionally, they offer it all free and open to the public. This season has a mixture of In-Person and Virtual events. Click the link below to see the schedule.

Over the years I have attended at least a dozen of these events and have enjoyed each one. Some were writers I was familiar with and excited to see. Others were new names to me which steered me to avenues of reading I would have otherwise missed out on experiencing.

2021-2022 Visiting Writers Series

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Posted in Personal Thoughts, Religion

Engraved in the Palms of God’s Hands

Following is a link to the copy of the Sunday morning message I delivered April 2018 in my role as a Lay Speaker.

Engraved in the Palms of God’s Hands

 

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Posted in Book Review

BEFORE WE WERE YOURS by Lisa Wingate

Simultaneously heart-breaking and heart-warming, this fictionalized story based on true events evokes sorrow and smiles and can bring about sleepless nights as the reader becomes invested in knowing what happens to the five siblings who are the heartbeat of this novel.

The true events that this story is inspired by surrounds the dealings of Georgia Tann who in the 1930s ran a corrupt adoption agency in Memphis, Tennessee. Children of poor families were kidnapped or deceitfully signed over into her care by parents not aware of what they were agreeing to. After placing the children in orphanages ran by the Tennessee Children’s Home Society, Ms. Tann then facilitated adoptions of the children into homes of wealthy couples.

The Foss siblings are indeed part of a poor family that lives on a shanty boat with their parents on the Mississippi River. However, they are well-loved and cared for to best of their parent’s abilities and are in no way abused or neglected by them. When their father has to reluctantly take their mother to a hospital due to problems that arise during childbirth, Rill the oldest sibling at twelve years old is placed in charge of the others until the parents can return. It is during this time the five children are caught in the web of Georgia Tann’s horrible schemes when they are taken from the boat and moved to an orphanage.

The novel actually jumps back and forth in time with the second story-line set in the present and following the actions of Avery Stafford. Avery is a lawyer, born into a wealthy family of prestige. She has returned home to Aiken, South Carolina to assist her ailing Senator father. As a successful federal prosecutor she is also being groomed both by her family and her father’s aide as a potential successor to her father’s Senate seat if his declining health continues. Additionally, she is being not so subtly pushed by her mother and future mother-in-law into setting a long awaited wedding date. A chance encounter with an elderly woman at an assisted living facility sets her on a journey that raises questions about a possible long-held family secret, as well as her willingness to continue on a path that seems more set by her family than her own choices.

Lisa Wingate has produced an engaging narrative that as I stated above at times breaks the reader’s heart as a witness to the sufferings endured by Rill and her siblings. Yet, there is an inspirational message in there as well as we see what determination and strength within a loving family bond can bring about. Personally, I found the sections that detailed Rill’s part of the story in the past as a much better written part of the book. The descriptions of place and events seemed much better crafted than the present day portions of the story. That said, the weaving together at the end of the book of the two separate story lines and their ultimate intersection bring about a satisfying ending to both. Taken together, both story lines shed light on the balance that must be taken in choosing to what extent our bonds to our families must be adhered to. Rill teaches us that there are times when we must fight with all we have to stick together. While, Avery’s lesson is that there are times when one must fight against some constraints that are placed upon them. In the end, however, both lessons show that love and devotion are key in handling each situation.

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